I am feeling quite down. I did not fully digest yet the fact that we will never live another Point Blank. Yet another sign of me getting older. Going back home is often synonymous with realizing how each year I stray further away from my younger self, from my parents; how I live in my own little bubble in Amsterdam, shielded from the reality of my family getting older, more sick, of places coming and going. Your favorite teenagehood bar? Gone. Your grandmother’s house? Sold. And now the skuat… I am feeling so empty right now, I hate myself for it, why am I so attached to the past?

Popol Vuh - Why Do I Still Sleep? (1983)

Popol Vuh is a German krautrock group; who pioneered the genre during the 70’s and kept going strong through the 20th century. I know very little of their work, it is one of many discographies on my list. The only glimpse I have from their catalog is this track, the last of their album Agape-Agape Love-Love, sent to me by Boyan (yes him, yet again). It is deeply melancholic, the accompanying video of an old tram in Vancouver in 1907 is so fitting. I will close off this article by quoting this comment from Marie-Louise Mikunda:

To me this video reflects our transient journey through life. People/animals no matter how dearly we may love, we have to release them at some point and what remains is only ourselves, this silent watcher of the passing forms in what we call our 'life'.
In this way it is a blessing to have those spacious gaps of aloneness where one receives glimpses of this death, while still being in this breathing body.